One Thing Two Thing Red Thing Blue Thing

In less the a week both of my groups will be gone, and my life will return to a semblance of order. No more minute by minute cancelations, and bookings. No more getting yelled at by the booking agency, the madricha, all the teachers, and the bus drivers. No more answering 3 phones at once. No more falling into bed exhausted, not because my work is done, but b/c I need to fall asleep. No more figuring out meals. No more talking to youth hostel directors who feel they know how to run every group. No more emergency trips to Tzefat. No more insurance numbers or issur bitchonim. No more arranging speakers. No more early morning visits to groups before breakfast time. MONDAY NIGHT....I AWAIT YOU!!!

Them's Fighting Words...

The following quote I took from another blog where the author was arguing with someone's post about Rabanim in America taking a stand on the hitnakut issue. I am not giving credit here, simply because I don't want responses to be shaded by who the commentator is, however if the commentator would like to have their name be attached you can definitely take credit for it in the comments. I appologize if you are offended that I am not quoting you with having written this...

"i never said there isn't a valid halachik opinion to disengagement. i believe that there is, and i actually agree with these three rabbis your fiance quoted. that wasn't my point. my point is, would you trust a rabbi who eats pork to pasken on kashrut? i don't believe there's any valid reason for a jew to live in america. why would you let one who does just that tell you what to do when it comes to israel. "aseh l'chah rav.." find somebody from the dati leumi community in israel, not YU/ner yisroel/lakewood"

One Step Closer

I did it! After just a little over a year and a half of being all Israeli and stuff I finally started the process to sign up for my socialized medical insurance, and my paying for socialized security. I tried to stay free for as long as I could, but I folded and found myself at an office, standing in a line, waiting for forms so that I could be processed. I asked the lady who I haded my filled out forms to what what the next step is. She replied that i will get more information in the mail, and I should just follow the directions. So don't be too shocked or worried, it's not like i'm covered, I'm just one step closer...

Exhaustion

Exhaustion is not remembering if you are daydreaming or nightdreaming, while being awake.
Exhaustion is wishing for 5 minutes of bed time.
Exhaustion is cringing at the sound of the cell phone tones.
Exhaustion is hearing cell phone tones everywhere you go.
Exhaustion is counting the hours you are going to be able to sleep later.
Exhaustion is going shopping in PJ's for tomorrow's breakfast.
Exhaustion is walking home cuz you're too tired to wait for a cab.
Exhaustion is falling asleep with the light on, becuase you forgot to turn it off.
Exhaustion is typing blogs because you're too tired to get up from the computer couch.
Exhaustion is ...

Hoppin' Along

I spent the day hopping. not a type, not shopping, not hoping, just hopping. After an engagement party in Netanya I fell asleep on the bus on the way back to Jerusalem. My friend woke me up at Mivaseret to let me know he was getting off, and I should wake up so I wouldn't end up at the end of the bus line. I stayed awake the next 20 minutes, and started walking towards my apartment. The cold air, and desire to be sleeping overcame the joy I feel in walking home, so I hailed a cab. The wonderful cab driver stopped about 15 feet from where I was and then honked for me to run to him when I started walking. I started running, and trip boom bang....now i'm hopping. The foot I hurt is actually doing quite nicely. I can put more pressure on it now then when I had first woken up, and there is no constant pain. The leg I didn't hurt is crying out for mercy. Hopping just isn't how it wanted to spend the day. My friend's have suggested that I get crutches, but I find them to be more trouble then their worth, plus I'd still be hopping...
At least it won me sympathy points at work today. My boss went out and brought me a coke, and the meetings were held at my desk today...
Oh that thin thin silver lining...

He Has No Idea

I was on a date tonight - more about that if he calls me again...(I called him to ask him out for Date #1, met him at a shabbat meal....whee) when I found myself telling a particular story. It's the story of why I switched from psychology to graphics in college.
I wanted to go into psychology or social work. I love "working" with teens, and find that they have an easy time sharing their lives with me. So why did I switch? I give most of the credit to this story:
I was a counselor in a camp where I met Josh (no, that's not his real name) Josh was a really sweet kid, smiley, cheerful, helpful, and not at all a trouble maker. The only problem we had with Josh was whenever there was a religious event, like tefillah, he was nowhere to be found. about two weeks into the trip I found myself deep in conversation with him about life. For some reason Josh decided to confide in me what he hadn't told anyone else. His father was abusive. Josh's older brother came home one day with a Kippa on his head, his father knocked it off, beat him up, and told him to get out of the house. Josh never saw his brother again. His father had grown up in Israel in a pretty religous home and decided to leave it all behind and go to America. Josh's mother grew up traditional, and tried to raise her family the same. His father was mostly verbally abusive to him and his brothers, but was physically abusive to his mother. He shared some pretty scary stories with me, that I'll never forget as long as I live. At the end of the summer, we tried to convince Josh not to go home. He was afraid that if he go back and protect his mother his father would kill her. So, Josh went home and found himself - at 17 years old - being his mother's leaning post. She confided in him that she wanted to leave his father, but was afraid if he found out he'd kill her. Almost every night Josh called me, and asked me what to do, what to tell her, how to keep her safe, etc... I'd hang up the phone and burst into tears. I called my aunt and asked her how she goes through life with clients like this. How can she have enough strength for everyone who depends on her for answers. She said after a while you learn how to detach yourself, and you recognize that it is a job. I didn't want that. I didn't ever want to be able to end a conversation like that and be ok. I decided then that social work/psychology wasn't really for me, and in looking for what would be second choice, I found graphic design. I stayed in touch with Josh for about two years. At our last conversation his mother still had not left his father, he was in a community college so he could live close to home and keep an eye on things, and he had decided there really couldn't be a Gd who would allow his mother to live like she was. He had no e-mail access and was paying for his own phone, both incoming and outgoing calls...and said he couldn't afford for me to call him anymore (he didn't have a land line) I don't know where he or his mother are today. Josh has no idea. He changed my life forever.

And I Thought Everything Was Perfect...

I did it. I discovered a problem with living in Israel. This was something that I could not have taken into account. Would not have thought through...
{ Before I get to the problem I want to clarify, the reason "my family does not live here" is not my biggest problem is b/c i simply look at myself as a ground layer. I know you're all on your way. Some sooner then others, but eventually we'll even get Yaakov & Devorah...you'll see :) ...}
...anyway back to the problem at hand. It is now sefira. While there was also sefira last year, I do not remember what I did about the music situation. In the States I would simply listen to talk radio. I started really enjoying it, where it got to the point that I listened more to talk radio year 'round then music radio. Aliya'ing and not driving has brought the radio to a halt, and has played a major role in my newfound love of downloading music and playing it off my computer nonstop... now back to sefira. I can listen to talk radio from the states online, but A. I honestly am amazed at how clueless I am to the big news stories in the States now, and B. The time schedule is all off... Sean isn't on until 10pm here...rush is on from 7 - 10...it's weird...and the morning shows, which I never liked, seem to always be on...
There is Israeli talk which I just found on my roommates radio, but I don't have a radio, can't follow the Hebrew talk shows if I'm not really listening, and do not have tiime to really listen to the noise I put on for background "life soundtrack" noise.
hmmmm

Comments

I started having a posting conversation on another blog. It reminds me when I was in middle school, and I couldn't "chat" on AOL, but the message boards weren't blocked. I thought I was so sneaky for figuring out I could have entire conversations online without the "chat" ablity. I did leave those boards with a great friend. A friend whom I have only met once since we started "talking" in 8th grade, and that was right before I made aliyah, but one who I have stayed in touch with electronically. Funny this computer life is.